4 ways to boost your body confidence after becoming a mum
Wednesday 5th September 2018
For many women, body confidence is at an all time low after having children: our body shape has changed, we gain or lose weight or have some extra lumps and bumps added on which weren't there before baby come along. Every woman's story and every woman's body is different.
I am mama to a very chatty 4-year old girl and an active 2-year old boy who both keep me on my toes.
After a combined two and a half years of breastfeeding and sleep deprivation with having a son who wakes up every night, my body is not the same as before.
I have lost a stone since the birth of my son.
Genetically, I have the tendency to lose weight in this kind of situations (thinking back of exams periods at university) and it takes me ages to gain this weight back. You might think, lucky you, but by losing weight I have lost some of my loved curves and some of my favourite clothes are now too big and don't flatter me at all. In the meantime I don't feel like my old self myself and not fully comfortable in the shape I have become.
A retired client told me:
"All young people are beautiful, Evi! They might not think that themselves, but they are".
I don't think all mums think of themselves as beautiful and when I look back at my teenage years, I definitely did not feel that confident in my body, although I didn't have signs of aging. Her comment illustrates to me that body insecurities stay with us irrespective of age.
How we feel about our body is relevant to each individual.
So what can we do to kickstart that body confidence? Here are a few tips I can recommend to new mothers in particular:
Inject some colour in your wardrobe
Many women revert to black because of its slimming properties, plus goes with everything. Maybe we stick to the same safe colours we're afraid of experimenting?
Here's a secret: black does not necessarily make you look slimmer.
It will only work if it is a colour that complements your natural colouring (through a combination of how your hair, skin and eye colour work together). Depending on your colour palette, there are many other colours that can make you look slimmer - navy, brown, pine and purple and charcoal to name just a few. Knowing the colours which suit you and how and where best to wear them will help you make you look slimmer, younger, more energised and help give you confidence in picking colours.
Choose the right styles for your body shape
When you are not happy with your body it is easy to hide yourself in baggy clothes but they will ultimately make you look bigger. We reach for the same styles because we feel comfortable and don't want to risk making a fashion 'faux pas'.
Selecting the most flattering fabrics and styles for your body shape will make the most of your good features and disguise the areas you are less happy about. You don't need to like every part of your body to be body confident. It's more about the accepting the body you currently have and appreciating the amazing things it has done for you, like growing a baby!
Evaluate your style
It's not only the clothes that don't fit that can throw your confidence when you become a parent, your life and your identity changes too. In one common example, the clothes you wear at work are often one the ways to express your personality, style and confidence but on maternity leave, you're doing a whole new job. I wasn't as confident in my new role as when I was a fundraiser, a job which I had been doing for almost 10 years.
The clothes I wear to the playgroup or to the park are very different to what I used to wear in the office. Clothes need to practical.
You don't want to have baby sick on a silk top or on your expensive handbag, so it's not a surprise that your wardrobe starts to gravitate to the more practical pieces.
Finding your style is an ongoing process, while you discover the "new you".
Understanding you style personality and how to express this through your wardrobe is key to making you feel great and confident in the clothes that you wear.
Invest some time and money in buying some nice clothes for you and not the kids
As a mum with young children I know first hand how hard it is to make yourself a priority.
When you are caring for a little person, you have very little time and often less money to spend on yourself than you used to.
You buy clothes for the kids, never thinking of yourself and you just reach for the same outfits day after day.
If you select colours and styles that suit you, you'll find them easy to wear and they'll will be good value for money. If you feel great in the clothes you wear, you'll not only feel better about yourself and your body confidence but the important people in your life will notice too!
I love helping my clients on their style journey, so if what you've read has made you think about updating your own wardrobe, then please don't hesitate to get in touch for a free no-obligation 15 min call where we can have an initial intro chat and I can answer any questions you may have.